Thursday, October 14, 2004

Funny Men of TV

Been watching the new Frank Skinner Show tonight. Not too bad, but is he REALLY one of the funniest men on TV? Surely not?

I know the standard of TV is slowly falling but surely Frank Skinner is not the best comedian on the box. Who do you find funny (please do not say Ricky Gervais - I can appreciate how clever The Office was - I have worked for Sales Managers just like that - but I did not find the show in the least bit funny).

To start you off I will nominate any programme featuring David Jason or Ronnie Barker (OK, I know I'm an old fart - but they are pure CLASS!!).

Or how about Yes Minister, and coming more up to date, QI with Stephen Fry and Alan Davies (have you seen Alan Davies live? - I saw him at the Comedy Club a couple of years ago - brilliant!!) or perhaps Have I Got News For You?

Lets have your suggestions - who knows - we could make a Chanel 4 programme out of it!!

Let me leave you tonight with a few thoughts about style:-

Things Men Need to Know About Style
1. Yes, Homer Simpson is funny but not on your tie.
2. Only consider tucking your jumper into your jeans if you're a priest.
3. Getting your girlfriend to iron your jeans is unacceptable. Ironing them yourself is evidence of mental imbalance.
4. Unless you own a ranch or are a nutty President give the cowboy boots a big miss. 5. Pointy lace-up shoes make women dry retch.
6. Going bald? Shave it off for God's sake.
7. Never take your top off in public, unless you've just won Wimbledon.
8. Donald Duck socks do not reflect your individuality nor the wildside of your corporate facade. They do, however, mean your mother still dresses you and you are a dick head.
9. Socks and sandals are lovely on Germans.
10. A jester hat does not a wacky man make.
11. Speedos are only acceptable on Olympic swimmers.
12. As are medallions.
13. And track suit tops and bottoms.
14. Do you have a grey, red and black asymmetrical doona? Freedom Furniture help line 1800 - GET A LIFE!
15. Open shirts: One button open = professional; Two buttons = casual; Three buttons = Confirmation you have Greek/Italian/MiddleEastern blood in your family tree.
16. Tight sleeveless muscle t-shirts are only ok if you're 17, can do the running-on-the-spot dance at the drop of a hat and are a member of NSync.
17. Those fold-up scooters + middle thirties exec = f*ckwit on wheels.
18. Here's a startling fact guys: Lara Croft isn't real.
19. Is your definition of "new season shopping" buying your footy club's new kit? Please seek professional help.
20. Unless you own a rap empire, leave the chunky gold bracelet and "ice"ring in the window of your local gaudy jewellery store where it can live a long and happy life and do no-one any harm.
21. You'll NEVER pull chicks if you put your mobile in the mobilephone pocket of your army camouflage pants.
22. Bleached blonde hair. If it doesn't work for Eddie Irvine, it sure as hell ain't going to do it for you.

Things Women Need To Know About Style
1. Show more cleavage.
2. Wear shorter skirts.

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